Five years ago to this very day I took a personality test.
Go ahead.
Go back 5 years on this Xanga site and see what type of person I was at the age of 22….

Did you?

If you’re on Facebook, you may need to click on my Xanga link for this one.
It’s really not that hard to click on a Xanga link ALL the way from Facebook.
But here I will even give the link….

http://www.xanga.com/pla2pus09 – 5 YEARS AGO TODAY

Okay…

The results of this simple personality test from 5 years ago astounded me!
I definitely do not see myself like this anymore…

So I retook it…

Here are the results from today:

You are Conscientious, Agreeable, Neurotic and Open

Extroversion:
You have low extroversion.
You are quiet and reserved in most social situations.
A low key, laid back lifestyle is important to you.
You tend to bond slowly, over time, with one or two people.

Conscientiousness:
You have high conscientiousness.
Intelligent and reliable, you tend to succeed in life.
Most things in your life are organized and planned well.
But you borderline on being a total perfectionist.

Agreeableness:
You have high agreeableness.
You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly.
Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone.
You give people the benefit of the doubt and don’t mind giving someone a second chance.

Neuroticism:
You have medium neuroticism.
You’re generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic.
Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy.
Your life is pretty smooth, but there’s a few emotional bumps you’d like to get rid of.

Openness to experience:
Your openness to new experiences is medium.
You are generally broad minded when it come to new things.
But if something crosses a moral line, there’s no way you’ll approve of it.
You are suspicious of anything too wacky, though you do still consider creativity a virtue.

Some things about me stayed the same and others didn’t.
I didn’t expect to be so different.
I am less extroverted and outgoing.
I am more neurotic.. (not a surprise! haha)

My point in all of this?

People change.

Some things about people stay the same.
Others don’t.
We can’t let tiny details about people’s personalities keep us from a beautiful friendship or even a long-term relationship.
Tiny details about people change over time.
Find out the concrete things important to you in a friend/significant other/whatever
There are definitely deal breakers in every relationship/friendship.
I am not saying that you and I and we should not have standards of some sort.
I am simply saying no one is perfect.
Since when did we decide we were worthy of perfection?
We are not perfect.

Take a deep breathe.
Choose to trust God and surrender everything to Him.
And go out on a limb.
You might find in 2 months this person you pursued is not a dependable friend – and that is important to you.
You might find in 6 months this person gets on your every last nerve – and you can’t live with that forever.
Or you may  find out that you have grown to truly love and appreciate this person in spite of their annoyances.

Friendship sees beyond a person’s flaws/failures and loves them unconditionally.
Marriage is the union of two flawed/failings human beings who choose to love each other through all the difficult big things and the really annoying little things.

The world is full of lonely people.
Go love someone for who they are.

This morning in my 8am class, it got so ridiculously funny that it would be hard to believe it happened at all.

My teacher is Dr. Denny.
My teacher is hilarious.
My teacher is brilliant.
The class?
Literary Theory and Criticism.
The text?
“The Secret Sharer” by Joseph Conrad.
The criticism?
Psychoanalytic Criticism.

So… you take a story written a long time ago about a young ship Captain who harbors a murderous fugitive within his quarters simply because he is lonely and there is an underlying sense of homo-erotic attraction, combined with a class room comprised of 90% women…..combined with psychoanalytic “Freudism” Criticism discussion….

And you get a lot of jokes.

Everything from my teacher saying,
“Look at me! I’m naked!” (paraphrasing the book) as another faculty member walked by!

…to the class causing him to blush (a grand feat in and of itself!) by laughing uncontrollably when he said,

“I know when I am getting screwed…. even if I am not being kissed!”
(after we asked him to bring us breakfast next week)

The rest of the morning was a serious of muted snickers and giggles… and mumbled “That’s what she said.”
All completely in good humor and disruptive.
The atmosphere was conducive for it this particular morning.

It probably doesn’t make a lot of sense reading it here, but I would have given anything to have a video camera in the classroom with me this morning.
I’ve never laughed so hard or so much, within an academic setting.

Yesterday some very, VERY close friends of mine experienced a tragedy.
They are in intense pain, therefore, so am I.
My heart aches alongside them.
Their 4 month old baby, Seth died unexpectedly.
Doctors assume it is SIDS.
SIDS cannot be explained or prevented.
It just happens.
I don’t know why it happened to them.
I hate that it happened to them.
Not that anyone would ever deserve such a tragedy, but especially not this family.
They just deserve the very best happiness… not this.
I couldn’t shake my sorrow yesterday.

I can only rest knowing that God is sovereign and good.
Seth is in the arms of Jesus.
Despite their present pain, Brian and Angie are also being held closely in the arms of Jesus.
I still don’t understand it with my frail human mind… but I don’t need to.
Praying for them has become a priority for me.
If you could say one for them too, I’d appreciate it.

* * *

I am haunted by my love for comparison
My fascination with a single common theme
And I am hounded by the fear that I might be losing it
Slipping from reality into dream

When my mind is muddled by the way it seems to work
I start looking for just one connecting Force
Someone to assure me we that didn’t lose the war today
That the battle’s General’s still riding on his horse

In the mornings when I pray, I’ve often come to You with dreams
Little bits of power that I can’t comprehend
And sometimes I can keep my eyes unclosed for long enough
To see the blowing of a distant steady Wind

The distance doesn’t take too long for You to cover it
And when You reach me, You just blow these things apart
You clear the crowd that’s gathered ’round the crisis of my soul
And whisper to my suffocating heart

“And” is the juice of the joints of the motion of life
“And” is the love that is between God and His beautiful wife
“And” has two hands and two feet and a long, lovely side
“And” rose three days after He was crucified

So You’re the Force of gravity that I feel pulling at my feet
You’re the Fuel at the center of the sun
And, it’s your Ghost that fills the atmosphere with what we need to breathe
And, everything I’ve ever wondered, You’re the one

Both my hands are stained with blood
And both my lips are stained with tears
From when I kissed the widow of the man I killed
And, yet You’re asking me to swallow Your forgiveness here today
You say the bond required for my pardon’s been fulfilled

“And” is the juice of the joints of the motion of life
“And” is the love that is between God and His beautiful wife
“And” has two hands and two feet and a long, lovely side
“And” rose three days after He was crucified

- “And” by Waterdeep

Snow is starting to melt.
It looks ugly, but I am glad I feel safer on the road once again.

This year has already been turning out to be full of anticipation and hope.
I love this!
My classes are going great so far…
In two weeks, I have lost 9 lbs!
A newly acquired, but treasured friendship is blossoming…
Chad and I are discovering more about each other every day….
It’s just been a great year so far!

I hope I can begin to read more of my Bible.
This is extremely difficult for me during the school semester when I am taking ALL English classes.
It’s not because I don’t enjoy reading my Bible…
It’s just that I already read soooo much that reading anything else plummets to the bottom of my priority list. :-
I’ll keep working at it.

Crazy cool snowfall today.
I shoveled snow for over an hour and loved it.
It wasn’t really all that cold or windy.
Just huge flakes of snow falling constantly all day.
Beautiful. <3

About 4 inches around 10am or so this morning…

Backyard…

New Door mat getting snowed on…

Before the plows came through…

Later on around 4pm… Almost 6 inches…

Our kitties went out onto the deck to check out the snow…

Chad brought home hot chocolate… <3

Welp, I am feeling better!
Antibiotics are amazing!

Tonight and all through tomorrow we are under a Severe Winter Weather Alert.
Yay.
First day of school?
Not happening anymore.
Bummer.
I am one of those nerds who really likes school.
But I am NOT driving in that mess tomorrow.
I shall be burning calories while shoveling snow!

Today we went to our friend’s house (The Morgans) to celebrate their son Jacob’s 3rd birthday.
First off, I freaking love this kid.
I sincerely hope our kid is just as amazing as he is.
He is super smart, enunciates well above his age, is a book worm and has the best giggly laugh.
Secondly, it made me smile to be among such wonderful people and feel friendships blossoming.
After 2 years of being on the move and not having friends, it’s nice to feel so welcomed and wanted.
Thirdly, there were only a few children there, but it made me excited to have kids someday soon.
It was just so fun to wrap the presents for Jacob and watch him blow out his candles and see his personalty so clearly.
It made Chad glad we didn’t have kids yet.
He said kids and babies were all any of the women even talked about.
LOL.
I am not worried about Chad.
I already know that he is gonna be “that guy”… the guy where the idea of kids scares him and he feels like he will never be prepared… and then once he holds his first child for the very first time all that will disappear and his heart will melt.
I know he will be that way because i know Chad. <3

I am just feeling very grateful right now.
I am grateful for new friends in KC.
I am grateful for long distance friends that are more than worth money and time spent to travel to and visit with.
I am grateful for my Hubs, who knows me and knows how to encourage me and be there for me.
I am grateful for our snuggly kitties.

*grateful for now and looking forward to what’s to come*

I am still sick.
I’m sick of it.
This is two weeks now.
I have been miserable and medicated for two weeks.
School starts Monday and I need to be alert.
I definitely don’t want to spread this to anyone else. :-
I made a doctor’s appointment today.
I made one for Chad too.
Apparently, you’re not supposed to take NyQuil longer than 7 days if “symptoms persist or worsen”
Whoops.

Here’s to hoping the doc gives me a magic bottle of pills that make all of this go away.

Another year.
Today is 1 – 1 – 11.
I am really hopeful for this year.
The goals I am setting for myself I need to take one day at a time.
I need to remind myself why I am pursuing these goals often, so that I don’t lose sight.
Losing sight would change everything.
Accomplishing my goals will change everything.
Change, in this case, is good.

Best things of 2010 (in chronological order):
Moved to Williamsburg.
Became a nanny to two amazing twin girls.
Moved away from Williamsburg to settle down in Kansas City.
Got a Temper-Pedic.
Adopted Maizie and Pumpkin.
Rescued Pita.
Started school at Park U.
Bought a house.
Made a friend and became closer to that friend.
Made our house a home.
Saw my best friend be a mommy and met her adorable son.
Visited with close friends and family over the holidays.

It was a good year!

My final went really well.
Studying definitely helped.
I feel bad for some classmates of mine that I fear did not study very well and were, therefore, unprepared for the complex questions my teacher seems to be able to easily come up with.
I also turned in my paper, which after several different edits is hopefully now an “A” paper.

Today I am working on everything that is due tomorrow.
I made a lot of progress last night, but I still have a good amount to go.
I have edited and revised all my papers for the Final Portfolio for my Non-fiction Prose class.
This class has been a little unnerving for me because we have yet to really receive a grade for anything except the mid-term.
We have turned in quite a bit of papers, but she is always wanting us to constantly edit and revise, so we just get “credit” for turning them in one time, but never a grade.
I have no idea what I am making in this class and that just unnerves me a bit. :-

In other class, I also don’t know what I am making, but for an entirely different reason.
We have not had to turn anything in all semester.
Homework has consisted of reading the assigned material and class participation as we discuss it.
I am not as worried though because this teachers grading system is like this:
If you want a “C”, do this….
If you want a “B”, do all of that, plus this…
If you want an “A”, do all of the above, plus this…
So from what I’ve been told, as long as you do the work assigned to each grade, that is the grade you will get.
I like that.

Well, off to more writing…

I have a final paper due at 3pm today.
I’ve already written it.
I actually liked the topic I was writing about, so that helped.
I wrote about the field I want to go into once I obtain my degree.
Title of my paper?
“Developmental Writing & Preparing Students for a Collegiate Setting: A Literature Review”
If you want to read my 10 page paper, then email me.

Starting January 1st, 2011 – I am setting goals for myself.
20 weeks of being healthy.
I’ve always bucked the system with “New Years Goals”
But – by golly – I just need structure. lol
My brother is going to set goals with me and we’ll keep encouraging each other.
I want to be healthy.

I have to get back to school now.
In addition to the paper I already finished, I am writing 3 others and “re-editing” 3 more on top of that.
One paper is a response paper to an article – about 2-3 pages long.
Another paper is a Reflective Analysis on my work over the semester in detail.
Lastly, I am writing a Literary Criticism paper for my Early American Literature class that I am actually excited to write. It has to be 5-7 pages or more with 5 outside scholarly sources.
Title?
The Power of Religious Rhetoric: Jonathan Edward’s “Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God”
Aw yeah.